Tuesday, September 9, 2014

// y o u n g l o v e m e d i a //

In my mind, I have thousands of thoughts swirling; as if caught in a whirlwind.  Around and again: tumbling as if caught in motion without end.  At times, I grab a few and I sit down at my desk.  In need of solitude, these times are infrequent and without pattern.  (oh, it's the parent life.  One I would never trade, despite the infrequency of solitude)  Yet, I enjoy this form of gathering.  I gather my thoughts and put my hands to work when the moments arise.  

I could write all day, if only life would let me.  I have always been a bit emotional:  I’ve desperately wanted to be so many things in my short life.  I’ve tried many different routes, without anything finality.  Without arriving where the line ends.  I remember being a child and falling into a heap on the floor.  Why?  Because all of a sudden nothing seemed to matter compared to these feelings I felt.  Whether I was attempting to understand the concept of a God that always was (holy heck, that was too big of a concept for a child!)  or the beauty of a butterfly, I could feel all the emotions.  Yes, I was a child with such enormous feelings; ones I was not truly able to manage.  Yet, writing never ceased to capture me.  The passion I felt for words sustained me through many fits of emotion.  In short, the words on the paper have been everything to me.  

I did not know anyone who felt the same way about literature, let alone felt the emotions that led me.  I experienced some loneliness.  Yet, I’m sure many writers would say the same.  I’d read my poetry to loved ones, but their reactions left me perplexed.  “Oh, that’s a bit deep for me.”  I did not understand that concept.  Too deep?  I never wanted to cut off my understanding at a certain level; there was too much to experience and understand.  Plus, didn’t people get it?  My poetry was written from the whirlwind: the thoughts and emotions that moved inside me.  It was not quite reality, but that wasn’t the point.  No one understood.  

It doesn’t surprise me that I also love photography.  Because it’s storytelling I love the most.  Whether it’s writing or taking a photo, I live to capture a moment’s center; the essence of an instant.  I want to remember.  I so desperately desire to remember the moments of worth and it’s only through writing and photography that I’ve realized every moment has worth.  The art is  figuring out which moments to record and which to sit back and enjoy.  I’m working on that.

So, that’s a bit of a backstory.  Here’s why I’m writing this:

I am going to be so incredibly vulnerable here.  My biggest fear is being “too much.”  Too needy, too emotional (I always am).  I hope this comes across the way I have imagined it.  I thought of writing this and at first I wasn’t afraid.  Now, I’m a bit nervous.  But please, as you read this remember my good intentions.  <3  

Jimmy and I have taken a lot of risks in our short time together.  We got married, became pregnant right away and moved across the country.  We had no idea what we were doing, but we left with so much hope.  I do not regret the hope: it’s much better than worry!  Yet, we were a bit naive.  After a few years of surprises, we dug ourself into a hole financially that seems a bit impossible to fix.  We desire nothing more than to financially support our family and everything we thought of, we’ve done.  Yet, and our close friends will vouch for this, it seems we have a case of “bad luck.”  We’ve been through so much and the stress of life has nearly landed us in the hospital.  My husband got shingles in his eye (stress related) and his vision is still not better. Yet, we cannot afford an eye doctor.  I’ve gotten hives and headaches.  Physically, we’ve suffered, not to mention emotionally as well.  I’ve seen my kids suffer a bit from the stress, although we’ve worked so hard to make their lives magical despite a lack of money.  I feel full at the thought of their childhood being spent outdoors: that is true wealth and I’m thankful for that realization.

So, now we are left with a bit of an idea on how to help ourselves.  But, we can’t invest in the things that will enable us to get out of our hole.  It feels as if we are stuck, yet I know we aren’t.  It will just take time and dedication.  Saving a little at a time. We will make goals and follow through.  Even though I know this, I still feel scared quite often.  

Jimmy and I know that our best bet is a steady income.  We cannot throw ourselves into a creative profession at the moment.  But we can do some creative ventures on the side.  And we can do it together.  Jimmy and I have always worked so well together.  When we were first dating, we worked at a coffee shop/music venue together.  It was at times challenging, yet overall we were an amazing team.  So, after that introduction I will finally get to the point:

We are starting a design group.  Our venture will be called Young Love Media and we cannot wait to move forward.  My husband has made a webpage and we’d love for you to give it a look.  Let us know what you think.  Let us know YOUR dreams!  If you’ve overcome obstacles to accomplish huge feats, please tell us how YOU did it.  We want to learn from you.  When we gaze to the future we see a community of people helping each other; fulfilling needs that we are made to fill.  We aren't alone.  

Here are a few photos of projects we have recently done.

And here's our website with more of our work:


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