Sunday, August 19, 2012

The Calm Before the Party

So, here I am.  I am still waiting, if you can believe it!  Yesterday, I took a 2.5 mile walk, hoping it would get things moving and in a way it did.  However, I am still not holding sweet Asher in my arms and that, my friends, is a travesty.  Oh boy, I am loosing it now.  :)

I feel a little sad about it, but mostly because, in our lives, timing is everything.  We have so much going on and so many things to figure out, that I am praying he comes soon.  Our son, Elliot, refuses to sit still for any amount of time, so finding someone to watch him is a must.  It would be best to start labor during the day, rather than the middle of the night.  I have been meditating on "ask and you shall receive."  I'm asking, for sure!  I feel as if the stress levels in our lives, or the things we have had to deal with, are not necessary.  It is not a part of our trials that teach us, but rather, they exist for the very opposite reason we exist.  They are stress inducers and hope-killers.  It feels similar to bad luck, and like our parents used to say, "There is no such thing as luck."

Ask and you shall receive.  Yes.  I shall ask and always believe, for life is good.  It is not something to fear.

Okay, let's get back to my current situation.  You know, the huge baby still residing in my "tummy."  I am letting go.  I have to.  I cannot let every other situation control my level of peace and positive thinking. I know what is true, but damn, is it hard to still be pregnant after a due date!  You look at that date, you count down the days and it's supposed to be magic or at least pretty darn close.  We shall see!  Hopefully, I will have news for you soon!
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